


The Cuckoo King

by toad_in_the_road



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Avenger Loki (Marvel), Awesome Brunnhilde | Valkyrie (Marvel), Depression, Gen, King Loki (Marvel), Loki (Marvel) Lives, Loki (Marvel) Needs a Hug, Not Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Compliant, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Post-Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie), References to Suicide, Scott is a Good Friend, Song: Everything I Wanted (Billie Eilish), Thor (Marvel) is a Good Bro, Time Heist baby, Time Travel, Yall are sleeping on ant man like honestly, back at it again fixing characters arcs, but we never act on it i swear, im gay, im sorry but it does fit the story, the Russos can kiss my ass, this is not a fanfic this is canon because the current "canon" sucks so im just gonna make my own
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-20
Updated: 2020-05-09
Packaged: 2021-03-01 21:34:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 5,979
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23753935
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/toad_in_the_road/pseuds/toad_in_the_road
Summary: A cuckoo bird is defined as a parasite, as it lays it's eggs in another bird's nest and the other bird raises the chick as it's own. Often, the cuckoo chick will attempt to kill its foster siblings. They are usually successful.*** *** ***Loki is the king of New Asgard in the unfortunate and ashen death of his brother, Thor. Thanos cruelty is not lost on him, forcing him to live and exist in a world without his one constant. But a chance to fix everything presents itself, and Loki will do anything to set things right.
Relationships: Bruce Banner & Tony Stark, It's basically everyone you know how it is, Loki & Avengers Team, Loki & Natasha Romanov, Loki & Steve Rogers, Loki & Thor (Marvel), Loki & Tony Stark, Nebula & Guardians of the Galaxy Team, Peter Parker & Tony Stark, Scott Lang & Avengers Team, Steve Rogers & Tony Stark
Comments: 16
Kudos: 102
Collections: Marvel





	1. The Dusting

**Author's Note:**

> so i was watching endgame and yelling at all the crap that goes on in it, and I had the idea for, you know, fixing it, but I also wanted to put a spin on it.
> 
> so I hope you enjoy this ride, it's like 75% angst but hey what do yall expect from me?

It was only when the Outrider grabbed Loki’s leg and shredded it did he wonder, mostly with humor, if he should have just joined Thanos when he got the chance instead of nearly dying and going on yet another hair-brained adventure with Thor and...this ragtag gang of space travellers. 

Loki grit his teeth so tightly it hurt, and flung a dagger right into the face of the creature. Ugh. Until now, he had never seen the Outriders. He had heard them, and heard of them, but nothing quite compared to the real deal. A demon with limbs aplenty, its skin looking burnt despite never having seen battle before. And the smell…

Loki heaved himself to his feet, adrenaline coursing through his veins and blocking out the pain for now. He glanced down at his leg, oozing blood sluggishly from underneath the torn pant leg. He didn’t want to see what the injury looked like.

“Brother!” Thor landed next to him, clutching his new axe-Stormbreaker, they called it. “Are you alright?! I couldn’t get here fast enough-”

“I’m fine,” Loki said, a bit more harshly than he meant to. “I don't need you to mind me. As you can see, I have handled the matter myself.” He gestured to the dead Outrider, one of the few remaining.

Thor looked almost amused. “Yes, great job. I assume you were attempting for the impromptu amputation then?”

Loki opened his mouth to retort, but there was suddenly an explosion near the trees that made him flinch. His heart stuttered. “Thanos.” 

Thor’s expression turned dark, and thunderclouds rumbled, seemingly appearing out of nowhere. “I’ll cut that bastard’s heart out.” Thor growled, and he took off with a roar, either ignoring or not hearing Loki’s shout of protest. 

Loki hoped it was the latter. 

Grumbling, he began to hike up the hill, dragging his injured leg behind him, cursing under his breath, still wary of any rogue Outriders. Surely, though, this was the end. It had to be. Stormbreaker was just as powerful, if not more powerful than Mjolnir, and this time Thor was not caught off guard by the Titan. It would be fine. It would all be fine-

Loki froze, his heart stuttering once again, but this time not from fear. This time, there was...a shift. 

Everything had gone quiet. The birds, which were once nearly as loud as the sounds of the battle, were silent, with only a few nervous chirps. _What has happened?_ They seemed to ask, scared and huddled. _Something is wrong, but what?_

Loki was shaking. 

He emerged to find the android-Vision, he believed it was called-lying on its back, grey and lifeless. Captain Rogers knelt beside it. “Oh my God.” Loki heard him say, but it felt like he was speaking underwater. 

Loki looked out onto the field, and his hand flew to his mouth in shock. The warriors, once so fierce it impressed him, were stumbling, crying out in fear and confusion as their comrades silently turned to ash.

“He did it, didn’t he?” The rabbit said, voice choked and lacking any sarcastic bite that had once been so amusing to Loki. 

Loki stared at his hands, waiting for his own fate, waiting to turn to ash and crumble. Surely he would not go to Valhalla, but maybe somewhere where he could finally rest. Maybe if the Norns were kind, they would allow him to see his mother one final time, and he could apologize…

But his hands stayed intact. All of him stayed intact. 

There was silence behind him, and Loki’s stomach dropped. With some difficulty, he turned, and saw the remaining Avengers staring at him with pity. 

No.

No no no, no. Surely he was not this unlucky, Thanos could not be so cruel as to allow him to live. To force him to live. But then, Thanos had never allowed him to die on the _Sanctuary_ , had he? 

Loki opened his mouth, and then closed it. When he finally forced the words to come out of his mouth, it sounded like someone else, voice soft and steeped in denial, even though it already knew the cruel truth.

“Has anyone seen my brother?”


	2. The Proposal

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is actually really fun to write tho. gives me something to do other than cry like a bitch

**Five years later**

It was only when the old truck pulled into New Asgard did Steve wonder if this was such a good idea. 

They hadn’t seen Loki for years since the failed counter strike on Thanos, and that had been more than enough. Loki had been filled with almost blackout rage, swearing he would cut Thanos into little pieces. But once it was revealed that Thanos no longer possessed the stones, he merely beheaded the giant, and limped out.

He did not speak a word to anyone after that. 

It was still a shock to Steve when Loki showed up alongside Thor, seemingly on their side. Though Steve wasn’t going to question it too much, because as long as Loki was taking out monsters, the question of his morality was for another time. 

Loki did seem different, though. He was more mellow, for sure, and didn’t walk like a stalking cat, although some of that could be attributed to compound fracture and shredded flesh in his shin. He refused any first aid, simply wanting to be left alone. He was more quiet too. Loki before hadn’t spoken much either, but he had a loud, pompous and snooty way about him, like he expected attention even when he wasn’t actively doing anything.

Of course, the silence and mellowness could be attributed to the fact he had just lost his big brother.

He had still refused treatment for his leg, preferring to walk with a heavy limp and badly concealed winces of pain. He had been silent and pale, not eating a thing. Bruce had tried to talk to him, but it was no use. Loki had essentially shut himself off from the rest of the world, a prisoner to his own grief.

Half of Steve wanted to yell at him to snap out of it, and the other half wanted to join in. Bucky, Wanda, Sam...and Thor of course, but Steve almost felt guilty when he was grieving for Thor, like it wasn’t his right to grieve. 

The little wooden sign welcomed them to New Asgard, and cautioned them to drive slowly. They would have taken the Nebula and Rocket’s ship, but that didn’t seem like it would make the best impression. Rocket and Bruce had followed along, two faces that Loki was somewhat familiar with. 

The town was colder than Steve expected, but not unpleasantly so. Several people were hauling fishing nets and crab traps around the dock, though Steve couldn’t tell if they were human or Asgardian. From what Bruce could gather from an Asgardian friend called Valkyrie, the Asgardians had been mostly untouched by the snap, which was a relief, considering Thanos had already slaughtered half of them by hand. 

It looked nice, peaceful. Nothing on fire and no slaves to Steve’s understanding. 

“Kind of a step down from golden palaces and magic hammers and whatnot.” Rocket said, hopping off the back of the truck where he and Bruce had been stuck once the truck parked on the pier. 

“Have a little compassion, pal. First they lost, Asgard, then half their people, then…” Bruce trailed off. “Well, you know.” 

Steve paid the driver, and stepped up beside Rocket and Bruce, looking around. Though they were in Norway, the place reminded him of New England. 

“You shouldn’t have come!” A female voice called out, and Steve turned to see a woman with dark skin and long, black curly hair walking up to greet them. 

Bruce grinned nevertheless. “Ah, Valkyrie!” He grinned, going up to her. “Good to see you, angry girl!” 

Valkyrie looked less excited. “So the big guy is still gone?” 

Bruce frowned. In a strange twist, the Hulk had been killed in the decimation, but not Bruce. He shook his head. “This is Rocket, and that’s Steve.” He gestured to both of them.

“Ma’am.” Steve said.

“How ya doin’?” Rocket said, leaning on a crab trap.

Valkyrie looked at Rocket skeptically, and then sighed. “He won’t see you.” She said.

Steve frowned. “That bad, huh?”

“He’s already trying to keep a low profile so the rest of the world doesn’t remember he’s here and try to prosecute him for that mess in New York. I check in on him to make sure he hasn’t died or anything, try and get him a little interaction.” She suddenly looked suspicious. “You’re not here to arrest him, are you?”

“No!” Bruce said. “I...we need his help.”

“Can you at least show us where he is?” Steve asked. 

Valkyrie paused, looking unsure. Then she pointed to a small house in the distance with a mossy roof. “There. Don’t come crying to me when he kicks you out.”

*** *** ***

Rocket knocked on the door, and there was no answer. The raccoon huffed, and knocked again, much louder this time. 

“I told you last time, Valkyrie. Go away!” A strained voice shouted. 

“Well, he ain’t dead.” Rocket said.

Steve was almost relieved to hear the bite in Loki’s voice. It meant he wasn’t entirely gone. He had half expected to find the mischief god catatonic. “Loki, it’s us!” Bruce called. “Me, Rocket-”

The door swung open, and Steve took a step back, surprised.

Loki didn’t even look like the same person anymore. No longer clad in fancy leather, he had on black pants and a light brown sweatshirt. His hair was unkempt, and surprisingly curly, and the bags under his eyes were only more obvious with the pallor of his skin. His face looked pinched, like he was in pain.

“Ah,” He said, voice soft. “I suppose they thought me a threat small enough they only needed Captain America to take me in?”

“We aren’t here to arrest you.” Steve said.

Loki almost looked disappointed. “No, I suppose you’re not.” He moved aside, staring at them with an unreadable expression. “Well? Aren’t you going to come in?”

Rocket shrugged, hopping up the creaking stairs and going inside, followed by Bruce. Steve stalled, still unsure of what to do. Loki fixed his exhausted stare on him. “I have no desire to kill you, Captain. Far too much work.”

Steve bit back a retort, and entered Loki’s house.

*** *** ***

“Pardon the darkness, I have an awful migraine at the moment.” Loki said, walking into a room adjacent to what Steve assumed to be a living room. Or at least meant to be one. It was incredibly minimalist, with a small couch, chair and coat rack. Not even a TV. There was a small table with five chairs in the room where Loki was-a kitchen, probably-so they congregated there. 

“I was making tea. Would you like any?” Loki asked.

“Uh, sure.” Bruce said. Steve nodded, and the scenario struck him as so absurd he wanted to laugh. If someone had told him five years ago that Loki would be serving them tea while they tried to convince him to time travel with them, he would...well, he would have done a number of things.

“So I assume you aren’t here because you wanted to say hello.” Loki said, handing a cup to Steve. 

“We…” Bruce trailed off, waiting for Loki to sit down. “We...we might have found a way to fix everything.” 

Loki froze, jaw clenching slightly. “And...what do you mean by everything?”

“Put things back to the way they were before Th-” Steve said, but jumped when Loki stood up suddenly. 

“Don’t!” Loki said, waving his hands almost manically. “Don’t…” He took a deep breath and sat down again, index finger and thumb pressed to his temple. “Don’t say his name.”

“We found a way.” Steve said, hoping Loki wasn’t about to throw them out of his house for this accidental transgression. “It’s a long shot, but it’s all we have.”

“All we have…” Loki repeated. He swirled his cup, watching the liquid inside. “We have nothing.”

“And we have a chance to change that.” Bruce said. “A chance to bring everyone back. Even Thor. I know you’re scared-”

“What is there to be scared of? I decapitated that bastard. And felt nothing. You’d think there would be some catharsis from killing the being who’s been in your nightmares for years. No. He lives on. His legacy lives on. He’s still in my head.” Loki’s face twisted, and Steve couldn’t tell if he was about to cry, shout, or kill them. 

Loki settled on a sigh. “I, myself, have absolutely nothing to lose. But they-” He gestured vaguely to the window. “They have something to lose. If this...plan goes wrong, they’ll have gone through three rulers in five years. Not the most stable kingdom, especially for a tiny one. And not to mention there’s no heir. I expect there would be quite the scramble for the crown, especially since not many of them like me anyway.”

“You seem to be handling this place alright.” Steve said.

“I hear enough whispers.” Loki said, staring down into the tea again. Bruce took a sip of his own and badly concealed a look of disgust. Loki didn’t seem to see it. “They know I killed Thor.”

Rocket scoffed. “That’s bullshit.”

“I did. I didn’t snap, but I led… _him_ to Earth. Without that, he wouldn’t even know this rock existed.” Loki sighed deeply. “Anyway, I appreciate the offer, but I can’t take that risk, as much as I’d like too. There’s many Asgardians. Ask one of them.”

“But we need you.” Steve said. 

Loki scoffed. “Please.” He took a sip of his own tea and made a face as well. “Apologies. This tastes like shit.”

“Loki. We need someone who knows about the stones. About him. You’re the only one who can do that.” Steve said.

“What is this plan, anyway?” Loki asked.

“Time travel.” Rocket said, and Loki blinked. “No, seriously.” Rocket said.

Loki’s mouth quirked into an almost-smile. “You’re even crazier than I gave you credit for. That’s probably how you stayed alive for so long.”

“And that’s how we’re going to stay alive. And get everyone back. We can do this.” Bruce said.

“Stop,” Loki said. “Just...stop. We lost. Why can’t you accept that?” 

“Yeah, and you’ve done such a great job movin’ on yourself.” Rocket said, looking around.

Loki shrugged. “Do as I say, not as I do.” He leaned back. “What does the rest of your motley group say to me joining?”

“They’re...skeptical. But they know you lost because of Thanos too. That puts you on the same level as the rest of us.” Steve said.

Loki glanced at Steve. “What about you, Captain? What do you think of this harebrained scheme? Of me?”

Steve blinked, a bit surprised with being put on the spot. “I…” He trailed off, and looked to Bruce and Rocket, who offered no backup. “I think that, yeah, you lost Thor. And for you, that’s pretty much the worst thing that could happen. I can’t imagine losing a brother.” _But I can imagine losing Bucky._

“So I think...you owe it to yourself to try. You deserve to have closure, to know you did all you could, if nothing else.” Steve finished. 

Loki stared at Steve for a long time before he sighed, and stood up. “I suppose if I kill you all after that I’d be a bad host.” He turned and left, and Steve noticed he still had a slight limp. “Give me an hour and I’ll be ready to go. I assume this is at least an overnight stay, after all.”


	3. An Unwanted Guest

“Well, if it isn’t the man of the hour himself. What happened to your helmet?” Stark asked, still looking ready to punch Loki if he moved too fast. Loki couldn’t blame him. He did throw the man out of a window once. 

“It’s an inconvenient thing to carry around, much like your suit.” Loki said, already feeling a new migraine coming on. “How are you, Stark?”

The man shrugged. “Could be worse, all things considering.”

“Lovely.” Loki said, brushing past the billionaire coolly. Evidently, the Avengers no longer held court at the tower he had seen when he first invaded Earth. Now they had a large, rolling compound in upstate New York. It looked like a military prison, and Loki briefly entertained the idea that he had been conned into coming to prison.

He didn’t really care much either way, to be honest. He hauled the duffel bag over his shoulder, taking off his mustard colored scarf. It was warmer than he had expected. 

Loki winced slightly when he saw Nebula, the sight of the mostly robotic assassin still making him nervous, even after she helped them find Thanos. He had seen her too many times in less pleasant circumstances.

“Hey!” Loki stiffened at the too-familiar shout, seeing none other than Clint Barton (of course, with his luck) striding towards him with a murderous look. Loki forced himself not to step back, vowing he would die with some grace as Barton drew a long sword that reminded him oddly of Hela’s. God, Ragnorak felt like a million years ago-

“Woah, woah Katniss!” Stark moved in front of Loki, much to his surprise. “We need him in one piece so this thing works. Okay? I know you two have some issues-” _That’s putting it lightly,_ Loki thought, somewhat amused. “-but he’s here to help. Right?” Stark glanced back, not at Loki, but at Bruce.

Bruce nodded. “Yeah.”

“I can speak for myself.” Loki protested.

“I don’t trust a word that comes out of your damn mouth,” Barton snapped. “Why is he here?!”

“Same as you, I am sure,” Loki said calmly. “I’ve lost a great deal as well. What about you?”

The fight left Barton like a loose balloon, and his sword dropped. He looked like he wanted to burst into tears, but he turned away. “Just don’t come near me.” Barton growled, and to his credit, Loki could hear no waver in his voice that gave away his grief.

Barton stalked off, and Loki glanced at Steve, who sighed. “His...his whole family was gone. He’s just...kinda been wandering around on his own for the past five years.” 

“Hm.” Loki said mildly. He followed Bruce, Rocket and Steve into the compound, swiveling his head around to take everything in. It was almost oppressive how empty the area was. Loki imagined that once it had been filled with people of all sorts, but now...now it was empty, the walls the same color as ash-

Loki cut off that line of thinking, trying to focus. “Hey! Careful with those!” A man Loki didn’t recognize called out. He turned, and looked startled to see Loki. He grinned, rushing up to him. “Hey! Uh, you’re Loki right?” He stuck out his hand. “Scott Lang. Ant-man. You probably haven’t heard of me, though.”

Loki glanced at Bruce, unsure if this was a prank, but Bruce wasn’t paying attention, focused now on some blinking piece of machinery and the currently yelling rabbit. “Ah...it’s a pleasure, Mr. Lang.” Loki said with uncertainty, shaking Lang’s hand. 

“Scott’s fine, dude. We’re gonna have to all become friends after all, right?” Lang grinned happily, seeming oblivious to the rest of the team who were giving Loki the cold shoulder-sans Bruce, Rocket, and Steve of course. 

“I...suppose.” Loki said, still unsure if this was some kind of cruel prank. 

“Watch it, GQ!” Loki jumped aside at the shout, stumbling aside when Stark marched past him, carrying several long tubes, glaring at the mischief god as though he had purposefully been in the way. 

Lang shrugged. “We’re all a little busy. So, uh, you know what we’re doing here?”

“I understand we intend to travel backwards in time. To...stop _him_ from getting the stones?” Loki asked.

“Time doesn’t work like that!” Bruce said, sounding frustrated. “You can’t change the past, it just becomes your present after that!”

Lang opened his mouth to retort, but Loki nodded. “Ah, I see. So...what are we doing then?”

“How does he just understand it-” Lang started to say, but Bruce interrupted him.

“We’re going to retrieve the stones from points in history, bring them back to make our own gauntlet, and then snap our own fingers.” Bruce said, glancing up from the blinking machine.

Loki blinked. It sounded crazy, but...try as he might, he couldn’t help but get his hopes up. The possibility of seeing Thor again, of finally putting right everything he had done...it seemed too good to be true, yet here he was. 

“So what do you know about quantum physics?” Lang asked.

Loki blinked. “Er...not a passable amount, I’m afraid.”

“Oh, cool, I’m not the only one.” Lang looked relieved, an easy-going, sunny smile back on his face that reminded Loki achingly of Thor. “I got demoted to a guy who shrinks down to plug shit in.”

“Shrink-” Loki started, but Scott grinned. 

“Ant-man, remember? I shrink and stuff. It’s cooler than it sounds, I promise.” He motioned for Loki to follow him. “Come on, I just ordered some food and I’m starving. Want some?”

Loki blinked, still thrown off by Lang’s friendly attitude. “I...suppose.” He said slowly.

“Cool. Hope you like sandwiches.”

*** *** ***

“That’s not an electron disruptor!” Rocket snapped, hanging upside down the platform of the machine, swatting away the tool Loki was offering.

Loki sighed. “I don’t know what it looks like.”

“It’s a little doohickey with a rubbery thing on the end. Jesus, have you lived under a rock your whole life?” Rocket snapped.

A blue hand emerged next to Loki, holding out what looked vaguely like an electric whisk. Loki jumped, not even realizing Nebula was next to him. “Perhaps we could label the tools.” She said in her robotic voice. Her voice always unnerved Loki the most. She was either screaming or whispering. There was no inbetween. 

“Sure.” Loki said nervously, trying to scoot away from Nebula without noticing. She noticed, but didn’t do anything.

“Whatever.” Rocket said, snatching the tool from Nebula’s hand and using it to do...something. Frankly, Loki had heard the machine explained to him several times, and he still didn’t understand. Neither did Steve, Scott, or the new man called ‘Rhodey’ based on their glazed looks. “Where the hell is Tony? He’s been gone for like, eight years.”

“Wonderful estimation.” Loki said dryly, standing up. “I’ll find him.” He was secretly relieved to get away from Nebula, though she oddly seemed to hold no dislike towards him.

That put her in the minority, however. Nearly everyone in the compound threw Loki suspicious looks, and tensed when he entered a room. Only Scott, Bruce, and Rocket seemed more or less relaxed around Loki. Steve was somewhat coming around, but he still kept his shield within reaching distance, although to be fair, Loki didn’t know if that was just a habit of the man’s. 

“What the hell are you doing?” Barton snapped, head jerking up when he caught Loki walking down the hall. Romanoff, seated beside him, pursed her lips, as though Loki had purposefully interrupted but she had decided to be the bigger person and let it go.

Barton was the worst. He took shots at Loki, both verbal and physical. He always missed, but it was still unpleasant to blink and then find a knife buried in the wall less than an inch from your nose. Though Loki couldn’t force himself to feel angry at Barton. He supposed he felt a similar way about Thanos, and would not be so restrained if he saw the Titan again. 

“I’m walking,” Loki said dryly. “And looking for Stark. Rocket needs him.”

“You sure you’re not planning to stab him? Do something awful?” Barton asked.

Loki was tempted to snap out a vague threat, or insult the man, but he couldn’t find the energy to do so. “No. I’m merely seeking his assistance.” He said. 

Romanoff regarded him, still suspicious, but finally jerked her head down towards the left hallway. “I think he’s there.” She said.

“Thank you.” Loki said, leaving rather quickly before Barton had another chance to get a word in. There was a door left ajar in the hall, and Loki heard someone talking softly, and he went to knock lightly, but paused, hearing Stark’s voice.

“Yeah, don’t worry about it, sweetheart. I’ll be home by Friday, and I promise I’ll bring you a present-no, I am not spoiling her, Pepper. I’ll bring you something too.” There was a pause, and then Stark laughed. “Yeah, see, now you’re not opposed to it.”

Loki was quiet, trying to figure out who he was talking to. It sounded like he was very close with these people, likely a family. But no one had mentioned Stark having a family. Of course, maybe they were trying to keep it a secret from Loki lest he decide to go on a murderous rampage.

“I love you too. See you soon.” Stark said, sounding upset. There was a quiet click, and then silence inside the room. Loki paused, and then quietly knocked on the doorframe.

“What?!” Stark said, sounding startled.

“Rocket is in need of your assistance, it seems,” Loki said. “Are you alright?”

“Never better.” Stark said quickly, exiting the room. “That little shit blow up something or what?”

“Who was that?” Loki said before he could stop himself. “If you don’t mind me asking. I happened to overhear.”

Stark paused, looking unsure if he wanted to divulge that information. “It...was Pepper and Morgan. My wife and daughter. Respectively.”

Loki blinked. “I was unaware you had a family.”

“Well, it’s kind of a newer gig of mine, and no one else here knew about it until a few weeks ago either, so don’t worry about it.” Stark said, starting to walk away briskly.

Loki blinked, confused. “What? And you’re still here?”

Stark glanced back. “What do you mean I’m still here?”

“I’m sure you’re aware, but this mission is highly dangerous. Are you sure you want to partake in it?” Loki asked.

Stark glared at him. “Yes, I’m sure. You don’t think I’ve thought this through? I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if I didn’t at least try.”

Loki held up his hands. “I’m not challenging you.” He paused, walking beside Stark. “If I may, how old is Morgan?”

Stark paused, glancing at Loki. “She’s...she just turned five.”

Loki nodded. “Congratulations.” 

“Hey, dingus!” Rocket shouted, waving a wrench. “What the hell took you so long?”

“What do you need, furball?” Stark asked. 

“We’re ready to test.” Rocket said.

Stark froze, an unreadable expression on his face. Finally, he nodded. “Well, alright then. What are we waiting for?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> me, drafting possible loki outfits: fangirls can have a little thirst. as a treat


	4. The Aether and the Orange

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for the wait, I was watching clone wars and doing nothing else

Loki wasn’t surprised when Barton volunteered to be sent back in time. 

He saw the look in the man’s eyes. The face of someone with nothing to lose, and little care as to whether he came out of the situation alive or not. Just a step away from madness.

Loki wondered what his final push would be in order to spiral into insanity. He had already been there, of course, but what would it take now? Was he even sane in this moment? Maybe not.

“Ready Clint?” Bruce asked. Clint nodded, looking stoic. Bruce leaned close to the monitors, reading text that was flying by so quickly it gave Loki a headache. 

“As I’ll ever be.” Barton said, and the red and white helmet expanded over his head. The machine whirred, and he disappeared.

Everything was dead silent for a long moment. Loki saw Bruce silently count to five before he tapped another button, and Barton reappeared, stumbling. 

Natasha broke rank first, rushing to Barton’s side. “Clint, are you alright?” She asked, her monotone voice now filled with naked concern. It surprised Loki.

Barton was clutching something, some sort of strange glove. It must be a Midgardian thing. “It worked.” Barton said. His voice was delirious with hope. “It worked.” He tossed the strange glove to Stark, and Stark caught it, looking just as shocked.

After what felt like a thousand years of silence, Steve spoke up. “Let’s plan this out then.”

*** *** ***

The holographic screens flickered to life, each one displaying a picture of an Infinity Stone, with the label ‘Time Heist Brainstorming Session’. Loki found it rather endearing, sitting on the floor of the room. All the seats were taken, and he didn’t feel like squeezing in next to anyone, especially considering most of the people in the room still expected him to stab anyone at any given moment. 

“Okay,” Steve said, pacing in front of the screens. “So the how works. Now we gottas figure out the when and where.” He looked around. “Almost everyone in this room has had an encounter with at least one of the six Infinity Stones.”

“Or substitute the word ‘encounter’ with ‘damn near killed by one’.” Stark added. 

“Well, I haven’t,” Scott said. “But I don’t even know what the hell you’re all talking about.”

“Regardless, we only have enough Pym particles for one round-trip each.” Bruce said. “And these stones have been in a lot of different places throughout history.” 

“Our history. So not a lot of convenient spots to just drop in on, yeah?” Stark said. 

“Which means we have to pick our targets.” Barton said. Loki nearly flinched, not realizing that Barton had been directly behind him. The man probably chose the spot so he could kill Loki at a moment’s notice.

“Correct.” Stark said. 

“So let’s start with the Aether.” Steve said, looking at Loki. “Loki, what do you know?”

Loki blinked in surprise, unable to quite conceal his shock at being picked first. Slowly, he stood up, feeling oddly nervous as he went to the front of the room. 

“Aether, Aether…” Loki said, trying to drum up something useful to tell the gathered team. He felt like he was giving a presentation, and the glares from Barton and mere presence of Nebula didn’t help.

“I was in prison during its time on Asgard, for the most part. I don’t have much experience interacting with it, but it was…” Loki trailed off, trying to match up dates in his head. “I’ll have to check a calendar to be precise, but I believe the event was sometime in 2013. October or November. The hard part is that due to the stone’s fluidity, it was inside Dr. Jane Foster.”

“Inside her?” Scott questioned, looking sick.

Loki nodded. “Like a virus. Which means you can’t just grab the stone and run.”

“We could,” Rocket grumbled. “You just won’t.”

“Do you think you could make something to get it out of her?” Steve asked.

“The raccoon and I might be able to throw something together.” Stark said.

Loki nodded curtly. “Ah, that’s about it. Any questions?” 

Scott raised his hand. “So, um, I’ve been reading Norse mythology-”

“No more questions.” Loki cut him off, going back to his seat and ignoring Scott’s squawk of protest. 

*** *** ***

“Alright, I’ve been mulling over teams.” Tony said, startling Loki, who was cutting an orange. The knife slipped, and Loki winced, watching a bright red drop of blood appear on the side of his finger.

“Who let him near knives?” Stark said, only half joking.

“I’m supervising.” Steve said, waving from behind the counter.

Loki sighed. “And here I thought you just wanted cereal. I’m hurt, Captain.”

“Why can’t you just peel an orange like a normal person?” Stark asked, glancing down at the folder in his hands. 

“I dislike the feeling of the peel under my fingernails,” Loki said. “Although I suppose now it hardly matters, I’ve bled all over it.” 

“Boohoo,” Stark said. “Alright, you and Rocket are going to Asgard for the Reality Stone.”

Loki jerked to attention, heart starting to beat faster. “What? No I’m not.”

Stark blinked. “Er, yes you are. You’re the only one here who’s been to Asgard.”

“I was in prison at the time,” Loki said, feeling an uncomfortable panic bubble up in his chest. “They’ll grab me when they see me.”

“Can’t you just change shape? I’ve seen you do it, Tonks.” Stark said.

“Still.” Loki said, unwilling and unable to tell Stark, explain the sad, pathetic truth of how Loki, one of the most powerful seidr wielders in Asgard’s modern history, was now useless, his magic having fled him little by little over the course of these five years to the point of being unable to summon even a tiny amount of glamour, unable to reach into his pocket dimension where he stored his knives and extra clothing. Just one more thing that Thanos had stolen from him. “It’s a risk.” He protested weakly. He was spiraling. If Stark pushed the issue…

Stark opened his mouth to argue, but Steve piped up. 

“I’ll trade.”

Both Stark and Loki froze.

“I’ll trade with Loki. Sounds like either mission doesn’t require our special skills.” Steve shrugged. “Loki can go to New York instead of me. I’ll go to Asgard.”

Stark opened his mouth, and then shut it. He sighed, evidently not caring enough to push the issue, or shatter the fragile compromise. “Fine, whatever. But you two owe me.” He glanced at Steve. “You’re gonna be breaking little Scotty’s heart, he was ecstatic about going on the mission with you.”

“Sorry to disappoint.” Loki said dryly, but he could have wept with relief. “Thank you.”

“Yeah, yeah, I’m a saint, whatever.” Tony waved him off, walking out 

Loki turned to salvage his orange and saw Steve staring at him. “What?”

“I wanna know why you don’t want to go back.” Steve said. 

Loki stiffened, and then looked down at the orange, stained with blood. Empty, lifeless blood. Drained of magic and hope. 

“I…” Loki swallowed hard. “Can’t use my magic.”

Steve blinked. “What? Why?”

“I just can’t. Since...Thor died. It started to fade away, and then eventually, I couldn’t do anything at all.” Loki said, voice hollow and broken.

Steve was quiet for a long time. “What else?”

Loki glared at Steve. “I just told you-”

“You’re afraid to see them all again, aren’t you? Your home.” Steve interrupted.

Loki’s jaw snapped shut. Steve smiled wryly. “I never pegged you as sentimental.”

“My home was destroyed, and most of the people I grew up with were destroyed with it.” Loki said, not bothering to disguise the rawness of his voice. “Forgive my sentimentality.”

Steve’s smile disappeared. “No, I…” He sighed. “Sorry, really bad joke. Point is, I get it. It was a lot like that coming out of the ice. I can’t imagine what it would be like to see it for yourself.” He shuffled. “But...you sure you’re up for this? I was going to 2012. The time when you...you know. Tried to take over Earth.”

“I won’t go off and join myself, if that’s what you’re worried about.” Loki said.

“That’s not it.” Steve said.

_No, it’s not. I will get to see myself back in the grip of insanity, under the thumb of that monster, and see Thor when he hated me as he should have._

“I’ll be fine, Captain.” Loki said, turning away.

There was silence, and then footsteps. Only when Loki was sure he was alone did he swipe at the orange as though it were the source of his pain. The citrus seeped into his wound like a vengeful animal, and fruit guts splattered across the wall like a crime scene. 

And there stood the magic-less, false Crown Prince of Asgard, or what remained of Asgard, anyway. The Cuckoo King did not move for several minutes until he noticed he was swaying, at which point he cleaned up the evidence and left.

Loki fell asleep hungry.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and now the fun begins!!!

**Author's Note:**

> follow my tumblr to chat and get updates!  
> https://www.tumblr.com/blog/toadintheroad


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